The Everyday Hopes during COVID

Interview by Abbi-Hope Park and Abigail Eun

How have you or your family been affected by COVID?
Both my parents at the beginning couldn’t work, but we were able to get stimulus checks. So, it wasn’t too bad. They were eventually able to return to work, which I’m thankful for. We’ve been pretty lucky. 

I’m pretty grateful that nothing has happened to us. A lot of people around me have gotten COVID. My friend has Type 1 diabetes, and she’s getting her vaccine. It would have been really terrible if she got COVID. She’s getting her second vaccine in a few weeks. Hopefully, she’ll be okay.

How did the vaccine process start in Los Angeles?
There are lots of government websites you go on [to register for a vaccine]. First, it was elders. Then, it was people that are at-risk who have immune disorders, and now it’s fast food workers. You have to go and sign up and check your eligibility, and then you’re on the waiting list. My friend said you have to check every morning because it refreshes every day.

Now that cases in L.A. County are going down and the vaccine is out, how do you feel? Is there anything you want to do once the pandemic is over?
My initial reaction was to be excited, “Oh, vaccine! It means it’s gonna be over, right?” But, now there are mutations and not everyone is going to be able to get it, so that deflates my balloon a little bit. But, I think I’m mostly hopeful for the future. I believe in science. I believe that eventually science is gonna win out. Hopefully. I’m knocking on wood. (Knocks on wood twice.) When it is all over, I want to go to a theme park. 

How did school proceed during quarantine?
Just Zoom. Yeah, school is kind of tough because I’m a senior. But because I’m in the IB (International Baccalaureate) program, we have a brick ton of stuff we need to finish. So, I’ve just been spending all my time writing essays. So that’s kind of what school is: just endless writing, working. It’s all meaningless work. You’re not really learning anything, you’re just doing meaningless assignments. But yeah, two months left!

How have you stayed involved in your high school throughout the pandemic?
Well, sports are just out of the question. So, we lost our season entirely. Things like yearbook and journalism, we can do that over Zoom. I joined the Newspaper Club in the middle of the pandemic. So, that’s been adding some structure to my life because no matter how much I want to give everything up, I have to write articles. I can’t let this whole team down. So, that’s kind of been giving me structure. So that’s just been going on. We’ve been working from home. There hasn’t been much of a change. I think that’s the biggest thing about COVID — it shows people that remote working is really possible. So, I think even when COVID is over, a lot of people are not going to return to traditional workspaces and it’s all going to be remote.

How do you feel personally about COVID-19?
To be honest, I feel like I am separated from my body. It feels like it’s not happening to me. It’s kind of surreal. I’m talking to my friends every single night and we’ll play Minecraft together. But, there is still that sense of isolation. Technology can only do so much, you know? It can bring you face-to-face and help you communicate, but there’s no physical presence. This is so privileged for me to say, but I feel like quarantine really gave me a chance for introspection, slowing down, and reflection. For example, I started meditating recently. I used to do it a lot in my junior year, but I stopped for a bit. I got back into it. I like to use guided meditation apps. My favorite one is called “Insight Timer.” It’s so good. 

There’s so many courses there too. Meditating definitely makes you more patient. It makes you less angry and irritable, but I’m still working on that because I’m a really angry person. Meditating has really helped a lot. Meditating could go two ways. For people who aren’t in touch with their feelings, they could use meditation as a way to be more in touch with their inner lives and thoughts. But for me, I’m too in touch with my feelings. I think too much. Meditation has really helped me to relax and empty my mind and have a blank slate. Before, I used to have constant traffic in my head — like a radio. Meditation has helped me to quiet it. I meditate every day before I sleep for ten minutes.

What has been a challenge during quarantine and what is something that you are glad you learned?
A challenge during quarantine has definitely been feeling discombobulated all the time. You’re just so lost all the time. Something good is that my relationships have actually gotten stronger. In times like this, you really know who your true friends are because they show themselves. You cling to the people that you have built a foundation with, so I got a lot closer to a lot of people. But it has also taught me that I don’t really interact with people as much as I thought I did. I don’t know. I don’t feel like I really need to get a lesson out of quarantine. There are people that are feeling fulfilled by it and while I did learn a lot more about who I am as a person, it’s a sucky experience overall.

What is something you would say to yourself at the beginning of the pandemic?
Don’t get your hopes up. It’s not going to be over soon. Just don’t be so impatient to get out; it’s not going to happen. Buckle in and prepare yourself. Because at the beginning I was like, “Oh, it’s just a vacation,” and then when it kept going, it was really hard to get myself back on track.

What have you been doing during quarantine to keep busy?
I’ve been reading a lot, watching a lot of movies, and watching a lot of YouTube. But I’m also sick of all media, except YouTube because [with] YouTube, you can never reach the end of it. You’re always discovering new channels and new weird niches that are strangely really popular. I’ve discovered a new person every week, become obsessed with them, then get sick of it because you only watch that person. All you have is time, and so you get sick of it. The internet is amazing, it’s so expansive! You can find something to be obsessed with every single week. 

I’ve been reading a lot more. I recently read Jane Eyre.More of a re-read because I read it when I was a kid, but I didn’t really understand it. It’s a masterpiece. Charlotte Brontë is a genius; she’s a prodigy. The romance is nice and all, but I feel like it’s just a vehicle for Charlotte Brontë’s real writing to shine through. She’s so good at what she does, which is surprising because she was so isolated. She was homeschooled by her pastor dad and had no one to play with except for her four siblings. It’s really amazing that it holds up so well after 200 years. 

I also just finished the book that the LAPL (Los Angeles Public Library) donated to us: They Called Us Enemy by George Takei. I just read The Bell Jar too. I’ve been reading everything that I’ve been saving up because you know, you buy books and you say you’ll read them, but you never do. But now, I’m finally reading all of them. I mainly just read, listen to music, and do homework. That’s all I do. I’ve stopped doing everything else. 

What kind of music do you listen to?
These days I’ve been into Beach House. Jacob Collier is always good. I’ve been really into Se So Neon (새소년) and Hyukoh (혁오), His Union, and Toku. I think Hyukoh is my favorite band. I’ve been getting really into those people. I’ll probably have new favorites next week, but right now that’s what I’m listening to.

I remember you really liked writing. Have you been working on anything new?
I’m in the brainstorming stage. I’m always trying to write, but not really writing. I’ve been busy with college and school, so I haven’t had a chance to keep writing. But, screenwriting is something I will definitely be getting back into.

How do you feel about going to college?
COVID has definitely put a damper on it. I’m significantly less excited than I would have been. It hasn’t really affected where I’m applying. I’m hoping by the time September rolls around, we will be allowed to go on campus. If I look at the people around me who started college during COVID and had to adapt to college life in the middle of a pandemic, they are struggling a lot. Hopefully, the vaccine will be generalized enough by that time. Depending on whatever college I go to, I’ll just do whatever their requirements are. I’ll do what they say.

Do you plan to stay in California, or go out of state? And what do you want to study?
Probably English or Comparative Literature. I applied to both in-state and out-of-state, but I’m hoping [for] out [of-state schools]. I’ve never actually seen the East Coast, except for Florida. I don’t think that’s a very accurate representation. I’m an American, so I want to know what the country looks like.